Remembering prostitution is a way to know why I am an Abolitionist.
Remembering is a way to drag my warrior spirit to the surface.
But
Remembering is a to know hell.
Remembering back in the day of punters owning, controlling and making me nothing is the only way to face truth.
I remember not to heal.
I remember not to forgive.
I remember to speak truth to power.
I remember to see, feel and be clear about the conditions of prostitution and dismiss the myths.
So what are the important things and points that I remember.
I remember that all punters wanted me to be non-human.
I remember so much pain that I have closed most of it down.
I remember rooms full of sweat, semen, fear and lack of an exit.
I remember every hole in my body being conquered and penetrated.
I remember no protection, no access to safety.
I remember being filmed for amateur porn.
I remember being exchanged through word of mouth of punters who wanted a sex doll.
I remember being closed to death as punters laughed.
I remember dreaming of suicide, or being a failed suicide.
I remembering drinking and drinking and drinking.
I remembering women and girls disappearing – maybe murdered.
I remember never making it rich.
I remember in fragments, I remember too much and I remember too little.
I know what hell is.
So I remember to fight on.
