I have been unable to write recently.

It is partly because my grief is going into body memories, and making me too exhausted to write.

It is partly because I am scared before I am on Radio 4 this Wednesday.

It is partly because I have allowed myself to be distracted by sports on TV.

But it mainly because I am aware that porn-hounds read or track my blog and use my words against me.

This, for a while, knocked the stuffing out of me.

But I know I would come back.

Here is a tiny amount of the way my experiences and words are used against me. All these examples are searches used to find this blog –

Ultimate slut, porn doll, torture porn, tortures in porn industry true, gang raped or forced me to orgasm in forced rape, he made the hooker scream, girl had enough porn, Rebecca sex blog, most horrifying porn made, Rebecca Mott a cunt, Rebecca Mott is skanky ho, tips sex, will that fit into my cunt, exited sex scream, cunt is weeping painful fuck foto, dead sex slaves fantasies, woman made to have anal sex, porn torture violent baby girls, many rapes one slut porn video, don’t breathe porn video, stop I can’t breathe porn, my stepdad fucked me in vagina, easy money for women, is sperm good to eat, violent porn, child porn, gang rape porn.

I am sure you find that hard, triggering or near to impossible – but that is my and many other exited women daily experience of daring to confront the sex trade.

We know that our words, our experiences and our determination to fight is made into porn, made into dirt – making our words and progress seemed to be nothing.

But the more punters, sex trade lobby and their supporters try to ridicule, destroy or distort our words and experiences, the more this prove we are speaking to the truth.

Our truths is highly dangerous, the sex trade lobby is right to be afraid that we will not just heard and read, but our words plant a seed of radical change.

It is a seed that turns upside-down all the lies and propaganda of the sex trade lobby.

It is a seed that shows all the excuses, lies, propaganda and manipulation of the sex trade lobby to be ridiculous.

It is a seed that sees clearly that the conditions of prostitution are of trafficking, conditions of slavery, that all aspects of prostitution is embedded in the conditions of torture.

This seed can only grow. It will branch out into deeper awareness and the slow ability to have deep empathy with all the prostituted.

The empathy is arriving when the language of sex work is abandoned. In its place the language of human rights, the language of revolution, the language of full humanity and the language of freedom.

Awareness is shown by not fighting for harm reduction – but seeing with a clear heart that all prostitution is in the line of male violence, and fighting for abolition for prostitution can never be made safe.

Empathy is learning the gift of truly listening and hearing when exited women speak out. This means not talking over, not treating exited women are victims or pets. This means not placing your life or experiences of male violent over the words of exited women.

Awareness is on the journey to arriving if you can learn that the violence done to the prostituted was never personal – it could not be personal for the main motivation of the sex trade is make all the prostituted sub-human.

I see the growth of awareness and empathy are a slow building of firm roots of an abolitionist movement.

No abolitionist movement will work unless is firmly rooted, and has enough solidness to deal with constant attacks, to cope with grief and pain that is embedded in all abolition.

Abolition must be rooted for it a long-term fight.

Abolition is like an oak, we may not see much change or progress, but each and every day our fight and determination is building another ring of growth.

I believe that sex trade will be eradicated – only it may not be in my lifetime.

I know each and every voice from many cultures and many centuries that speak against the sex trade are inside the rings of growth towards abolition.

That is why the porn-hounds fear our voices so much.

They know the abolitionist movement is progressing, they know their language of labour or empowerment cannot hold water.

I know oppressors always are their must violent when they feel their structures of power and control getting undermined or slowly destroyed.

The sex trade lobby is reacting with violent words, with violence to hold onto their control over exited women, with violence inside social media, with mental violence when speaking to the media or at conferences.

The sex trade lobby is very noisy, full of bullies, always grabbing hold of headlines – but this is because they are such a tiny minority, and scared that fewer people believe their language of hate and fear.

I see that the abolitionist movement is making amazing progress that the sex trade lobby spends so much time and energy trying to kill us.

So although it hurts and triggers me, having so many porn-hounds on my blog.

I take it as a huge back-handed compliment, for it shows how they afraid the sex trade lobby of this wee blog.

17 responses to “Hounds

  1. So pleased to read your writing. And agree that abolition is a long-fight. Fighting to reduce violence against women (VAW) is the battle of the century with prostitution being one form of VAW. Speaking truth to power is part of the solution. Thank-you so much Rebecca for writing your truth! Your voice is very important in this struggle. I am proud to be standing with you.


  2. Thanks Linda. We need to know why violence against the prostituted must separated from general vaw – for it need to seen as an attack that makes the prostituted sub-human. That is why I tend to use the language of torture rather than just it about vaw.


  3. Thank you Rebecca for writing this and for being so strong in this fight. Thank your for showing to the world who and what they are, for taking away their masks of smooth talk. Ultimately we will make it, because as you say with the oak: We can grow, and we know what the truth is, and what solidarity is. They haven’t got a clue – marketing slogans and insults is all they have.


  4. Hi there

    I have just listened to your speech on radio 4; you made me cry! I never thought that it was as bad as that, i have no experience of prostitutes at all. Your speech upset me greatly. I am so glad your out of it. I think you put your point of view over in an excellent way a great speech!!!!
    with kind regards and with respect Cheryl


  5. Just listened to you on Radio 4. Was trying to work, but had to stop as what you said was so incredibly moving and powerful. You are an amazing woman. Thank you for sharing that which must have been so difficult. x


  6. I just heard you on Radio 4. A brilliant, emotional, clever broadcast. I hope that sex trade will be eradicated – in your lifetime. It will be with women like you.


  7. Just been listening to the radio 4 prog was very good really made the point Where do I sign up to help
    just noticed it asks for website just type heritagelaw into google that will find it


  8. Dear Rebecca,
    I Just listened to you on Radio 4. Well done, you should be proud of yourself, conveying such a powerful message, that we rarely hear voiced. Thank you for putting yourself forward to speak so passionately of your experience and views. It is not a view that is often heard or widely accepted. We choose to “gild the turd” in portrayals of prostitution such as pretty woman etc, glossing over the true horror, lest it interferes with someones enjoyment
    I hope you continue to go from strength to strength. We need more people like you to stand up and speak the real truth, shattering the fake image that is perpetuated by those with a vested interest.
    Stay strong and be proud
    Thank you


  9. Sending you love and strength as you fight to make your voice heard. Thank you for what you are doing for all women


  10. Pingback: Rebecca Mott on BBC Radio 4 Four Thought | Anti-Porn Feminists

  11. Heard you on radio 4 last night and was equally horrified and inspired by your words. As a foster-carer with training in attachment theory, as the child of an abusive parent, and having narrowly avoided rape myself, I felt you articulated very well the use of detachment as a coping mechanism. Your words have stayed with me, as I’m sure they will with many others. You are doing very good work, your actions will help many and you are evidently so much more than just the sum of your experience. I hope you remember every day how far you’ve travelled and how amazingly strong you are to have made each and every one of those steps. Lots of luck in helping other woman to realise their true worth.


  12. You are amazing I just listened to your BBC broadcast. I have to say I once believed the ‘prostitution is just consensual sex for money’ line. Thankfully there are women like you that tell their stories and make the data on prostitution known.
    I now support abolition of prostitution because it is a form of slavery.


  13. Rebecca, I just listened to your presentation on radio 4. Strong, brilliant and unforgettable!

    Thank you for having the courage to open your life on radio to present the real face of prostitution.


  14. Dear Rebecca,

    I heard your piece on Radio 4 during the week when I was driving home and it brought me to tears. I have encouraged everyone, particularly my male friends, to listen to it. Thank you so much for challenging the way that I think and being so brave to share your experiences.

    My personal view is that in a world where pornography has become increasingly normalised as a result of the internet, the advancement of equality in our society is in danger of taking a backward step. Whilst I am liberal, the depiction of sex in a lot of what has become mainstream pornography goes beyond what can be considered ‘normal’, and I fear generations of boys are growing up with certain forms of violence against women being normalised. I labour under no misapprehension that this violence already exists and has done for thousands of years, but it should be getting less, rather than more, ingrained in a modern liberal society like ours.

    As a result of your piece I am going to spend time finding out about your campaign and to see what I can do to raise awareness of this issue.

    Thanks again.


  15. I too have just heard your have Radio 4 speech as a listener from Canada. Please know that you are a brave and beautiful woman. I have never heard and of you or your campaign but will remember you in my prayers as you are a precious child in God’s sight, be of good courage. I have been privileged to be brought up in a family that believed in respecting and treating woman as you would your sister or mother and the men in my life have always treated myself and women as such. May your message be one that is heard loud and clear. Prostitution isn’t the oldest profession – it’s the oldest oppression. May you be encouraged by your many silent supporters. Many think as you do and need to raise their voices with you. Blessings.


  16. Rebecca, I heard your words on R4 early morning – I thought I know that voice! I was moved and inspired by your amazing writing. Powerful and important work. Your achievements so far are considerable and hope you will continue to write – the world needs your honesty


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