Your Language is Part of the Problem

I have often written on how the language around prostitution and porn is the language of the privileged used to silenced the prostituted class.

It is a language forged by punters and the sex trade, and there can be no reclaiming of the words that keep the prostituted as goods, as sub-humans. No amount of “feminist” reclaiming, no amount of liberal re-framing, and no wordplay can take away the destructive force of this language.

It is this language that make the male violence to the prostituted into a non-crime, it is this language that said the prostituted feel no pain and have no boundaries, it is the language that it impossible to rape the prostituted.

That is the language you think is worth reclaiming,  that is the language that is force onto the prostituted until they forget that they have multiple voices.

I will write to some of these words that the ignorant want to take back.


This word is now part of pop culture.

I cannot be surprised, for pimps have always wanted to see as misunderstood heroes, as the way to quick power and fame.

But I do find it curious how it has become to pimp, be pimp and plain old pimp to mean anything that is made better and more commercial.

You can pimp your car, pimp your wedding, pimp up your cooking, pimp your baby, I suppose we can pimp out lol pictures of cats.

This slang is nothing to do with who and what pimps are – this language makes pimps into lovable cartoon figures.

What is a pimp in this new language.

It is a mashup of imagined 70’s images and ideas from rap videos.

The pimp is a racist image of mostly Black American men who get out of poverty by having a stable of girls.

This pimp cannot be White – he may be a cartoon Asian or Latino. It is nothing to do with reality that pimps are rarely visible.

Pimps comes from all ethnic backgrounds, they are men and some women who enjoy the power-trip of selling vulnerable women and girls, but mostly love the money they make.

There is nothing glamorous or romantic about being a pimp.

A pimp is a person who has no empathy, a pimp do not think twice about torture or threat of murder to control his goods, a pimp cannot see any humanity in the prostituted and so make them his slaves.

But the most important thing to know about the reality of pimps is how most make themselves invisible.

Many are called businessmen who keep away from the violence but are awash with the blood money.

Many female pimps will hide in plain sight by re-naming themselves as sex workers or saying they are dominatrixes.

Other will shelter by saying they are just boyfriends, just close friends, just family – while profiteering as the prostitute is being paid to be raped.

Each time you say pimp as a positive – you are allowing those rapes to continue.


I am glad that Slutwalks are going out of fashion.

But still it hard as an exited woman to see anything good about the need to be label as Slut.

I was made into a slut, I was made the shit that you step over.

Each and every prostitute or woman inside porn are made into sluts, it is a role that slowly kills their will to live – so why do some women think it can be reclaimed.

Think what slut means to the prostitute.

To be a slut inside the sex trade is lose all right to have consent.

To be a slut inside the sex trade is have all sexual violence in all cells of your body, and inside your mind so much that you do anything to never sleep.

To be a slut inside the sex trade is to know you be thrown away at any time, and if you die or disappear it will be as you never existed.

So to see or know about women dressing up as cartoon sluts is the deepest hurt the non-prostituted can do to the prostituted class.

It is a game to you, it may be briefly empowering to you, it may be just some “ho and pimp” party for one night to you – but your fun is killing us.

As you dress as your inner slut – you refuse to see the consequences on the women and girls who been in or are in the sex trade.

Reclaiming slut is not a political act, it is just individual therapy – it is too selfish to be labelled as feminist or political.


Instead of slut, there is a slow movement to reclaim whore for women.

This cannot be done, and it saddened me that some women speak over exited women to get back the word.

Whore has always used by the profiteers of the sex trade to give the illusion that they are women-friendly.

The trick is get into feminism the concept of the Sacred Whore – which is mostly made-up history and a play on feminist language.

It is the convenient concept that the whore is this unique being with supernatural sexual powers, with no human reach to pain or grief.

The myth of the whore is not only does she give endless sex to endless men – but she also is their carer, their confident, their comfort in wars.

The whore is never human – so men can any violence to her, men can use her and toss her away – or being a “goddess”, no harms can be done to the whore.

This male construction is making of temple whores, making of courtesans, making of escorts.

In reality, to be a whore is to trapped in a room with streams of punters who have enough money to be entitled to torture and murder at any time – for their power and privilege means it never a crime or even an event.

There is nothing empowering about being a whore – only in male porn fantasies, and why would any woman want to reclaim that.


It so hard to write about language that is reclaim from the sex trade.

The reclaiming is naive for it takes no account that the sex trade is an institution that daily is destroying millions of prostituted women and girls.

Reclaiming these words is an individual act mainly by folks who refuse to view with a clear eye this genocide.

As you play with words, the prostituted are being tortured, sold into hell and losing their humanity.

We cannot reclaim these words – as each and every the prostituted are murdered and made to disappear.

There is no time to be that self-indulgent.

8 responses to “Your Language is Part of the Problem

  1. Thank you so much for writing this; I, too, am an exited woman, and the words used by others to describe me as a prostitute caused me much pain. Words hold tremendous power – the power to hurt, the power to heal.


  2. Looks like a lot of exaggerations without real facts that are in the majority. It is just a lot of ‘feelings’, and allowances to let the words that hurt, develop within the mind of the individual. Actual intention is way different than perceived intention. “Mommy, that man looked at me funny. I think he wants to do something bad to me… twenty years from now.”
    Lets quit the exaggerations and suck it up, If you are not living, or participating within the sex trade, then quite commenting about it.


  3. @jam24u: Your lack of compassion for other people is stunning. And by the way, those of us women no longer in prostitution have as much right to publicly speak our minds as anyone else. That’s the whole point of an online forum. Attempts to silence us just won’t work, sorry.


  4. To tell me or any other exited woman to “suck it up”.is a classic silencing tactic, which is never works. We are beyond your attempts to control us. But then as your first sentence makes no sense, and you cannot use spellcheck, jam24u, it very hard to care about your opinion.


  5. jam24u, what makes you the authority on the facts of prostitution? And how dare you minimize feelings, that is what makes us human. Feelings are also what is severely LACKING in men who buy sex (also RESPECT, a severe lack of respect for females) that results in the deep trauma that prostituted women develop. How about you quit your minimizing of the horrors of prostitution and show these women some RESPECT when they speak about their experiences and LISTEN?! Telling prostituted women to “suck it up” is like telling holocaust survivors to “suck it up” — no one has time for such cruelty and ignorance.


  6. “Looks like a lot of exaggerations without real facts that are in the majority. It is just a lot of ‘feelings’, and allowances to let the words that hurt, develop within the mind of the individual. Actual intention is way different than perceived intention. “Mommy, that man looked at me funny. I think he wants to do something bad to me… twenty years from now.”
    Lets quit the exaggerations and suck it up, If you are not living, or participating within the sex trade, then quite commenting about it.”

    What was exaggerated? And how? You seem confident about your position, yet you utterly failed to back it up with sufficient examples. People also don’t have to be in the sex industry themselves to know what atrocities occur behind closed doors. Maybe you should educate yourself on that before blowing hot air about something you apparently know nothing about.


  7. I always get angry when I hear the word “pimp” used in such a careless manner. Of course the word has caught on with men and teens as well as guys in their 20’s. I always call people on their use of that enraging word. They always try to laugh it off or make light of it. Real f’in mature. Slutwalk. The “walk” itself ticks me off as well as the name. Many of the walks were controlled by men! Why perpetuate a word such as these? These are not intended to be “empowering” nor are they. Gee what offensive words can we call guys? Not many! Inequality once more. Words can hurt. Please think before you speak (if it’s possible) “guys!”


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