My Speech

This was spoken at a Rad Fem conference this year.


It is a great honour to be speaking here as an exited woman.

I wish to speak of the use of language,  and how it can keep the prostituted class as sub-humans.

It is the use of language that only sees it as “real” , when the violence that is the norm for prostituted women and girls is viewed and create outrage when it effects non-prostituted women and girls.

It is the language that speaks of the porn world and the real world.

It is the language that imagines that torture porn is new, when it has been inside the bodies and minds of  the prostituted class for at least 3000 years.

Trauma is a constant shadow for exited women. We have learnt to adapt by acting in control. We keep our focus on building the road to abolition.

Extreme mental, physical and sexual torturing were our norms. It was not just “lots of rapes”. Our reality does not fit the language of rape.

Our language is the language of torture. It is the language of the stealing and utter destruction of the prostituted’s basic human rights.

The purpose of the sex trade is to make all the prostituted class into sub-humans. They make the prostituted into disposable goods.

To understand the depths of trauma for exited women – it is important to know that they are raped so often, that it is not viewed as rape, it is just their routine. How can the language of rape have meaning for that?

To see our trauma – you must see that the prostituted are made into living pieces of porn. That each and every new fashion in sadist porn is poured into our bodies and minds.

To comprehend our trauma – know we were viewed as disposable goods. Goods that were experimented on, to see how sexual torturing we could take without actually dying.

We hold inside our minds and bodies the unspeakable.

The sex trade works on the assumption that exited women will have no words to express their realities – or if we can find words, we will not be believed, or others will turn away in disgust.

We have no choice but to speak our for we will not be forced back into silence.

Hear how we only survived by making ourselves into the living dead.

Know we are re-learning how to be human.

See that we lived in a world where we learnt to obey. We taught ourselves to perform being happy when in pain and terror.

Understand we could not know we had a past, and could not believe in a future. We lived from one moment to the next.

We are silenced by the constant threats from the sex trade lobby. These are not trolls who hide behind their computers – the sex trade lobby is mainly made up of pimps and punters. They are funded by sex trade profiteers and are highly organised.

They have all the time in the world to mentally destroyed and silenced exited women.

The sex trade lobby views exited women as goods who have left their control.

They have no concept that exited women are humans – so will have no conscience about pushing us beyond despair.

It is their purpose to push exited women back into the sex trade or to destroy us utterly.

They are angry that we are no longer their slaves.

Our multiple voices terrified the sex trade lobby – or we are believed, and in that belief we are forcing real change or the prostituted class.

We can never stop speaking out until all of the prostituted have true freedom.

2 responses to “My Speech

  1. Reblogged this on gigoid and commented:
    Here is a speech by a woman who knows whereof she speaks….first hand. She is one of the strongest women I’ve ever seen…


  2. Awesome speech! I’ve read and re-read this post as I do many of your other posts because they are so powerful, profound and teach me a lot. Each read is a deeper layer of understanding for me.

    “Our multiple voices terrified the sex trade lobby – or we are believed, and in that belief we are forcing real change or the prostituted class.”

    I’m sorry that the sex trade lobby is so nasty! I hope that your network gathers much strength from eachother to continue doing what you do because your Spirits are so much stronger than the dulled, deadened ones of sex trade lobbyists. One of my heroes, John Trudell, has been described by the FBI as “extremely eloquent, therefore extremely dangerous”, and that’s how I feel about your blog and the impact you have on the commercial sex torture industry users & profiteers.

    Your individual and collective voices are definitely making an impact. I’m just one person, but I’ve been talking to people in my circles about porn and prostitution (baby steps and baby spoonfuls of truth with some of them) and it’s infectious. For example, I was talking to my 40-year old male officemate about porn and prostitution (because during down time I sometimes read blogs and he always wants to know what I’m reading about), so I filled him in, read some stuff out loud, discussion followed, and our convo got a little loud and heated. Another (younger) coworker was nearby and overheard us, asked what was going on and I filled her in, then she went back to her desk on the other side of the office. Then another coworker came by a little later and said he heard about our conversation from the other coworker and was curious about it. So I filled him in on the issue and the anti-porn/anti-prostitution position which I’ve always had but which comes out MUCH stronger and clearer after coming across yours and other blogs from Survivors Connect, so THANK YOU! The two colleagues from the other side of the office are in their early 20’s and I don’t think they’re too used to heavy/deep convos of this nature, at least not in the office! I feel like (for once!) I have the advantage of being the older, “militant” lezbo and so instead of “debating” with the younger ones, it was more like teaching.

    Sorry for the ramble/novel, I just wanted to lay out the domino effect that your blog has with just one person. You are making a difference and sometimes we have no idea the kind of difference we make or the kinds of seeds we plant when we speak our Truth.

    I appreciate the full human being that you are as I learn your Truth and I wish you much peace, health & happiness.


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