Here’s the Harm

I am so sick and very bored that it is said – there is no real harm in porn.

Well, I know the harm from many angles – but mainly from be forced to view it as a child, and from inside porn – but also seeing the daily damage of the normalisation of porn.

It is a lie that to say that porn causes no harm – a lie that is said so there can be yet more profit made by porn profiteers. Make it normal, part of the background noise of many societies – then there are many more consumers, and more and more money.

Porn is just about following the money – nothing more – all other language around is just manipulation and a lie.


I was shown hard-core porn as a child.

It was preparation for sexual abuse – it got me ready to be suitable material to be inside the sex trade.

There’s the harm.

I know those that defend porn, refuse to let outsiders see or know what hard-porn is and always has been.

They deflect attention by comparing hard-core porn to erotica, saying it is words and images of some sexual liberation.

They scare off people speaking out against the porn – saying they are moralists, maybe religious fundamentalists, must be right-wing fanatics, and of course the classic anti-sex.

Well seeing hard-core porn as a child, makes you see it clear and I don’t make excuses for it.

I was shown it in the late 60’s and early 70’s – and don’t ever believe that hard-core porn was nicer than now.

The purpose of hard-core porn since it was invented – maybe when men discover they could make an image of violent rape and sexual torturing of women and girls, and could exchange that image for goods – it’s purpose was to show through depictions of violent sex acts, the true hate and rage that many men have for women and girls.

I saw Hustler – with its constant images of sexual torture of all types of women and girls, wrapped up in racism, anti-feminist claptrap, laughing at child rape, hate of everything women and girls do, achieve or strive for.

I saw photos and recording from rape-murder crime scenes. My stepdad had access through having money to police records.

I saw the photos of the Manson murders before it was clean up for the press. I heard the terrifying tape of one of the Moors Murders girl victims.

I was shown “Chester the Molester”, the infamous cartoon in Hustler that celebrated raping young girls – made it so funny.

I saw porn images where it appeared that the women in them must be dead – their eyes were dead – they must have be been dead coz how could anyone survive that much pain.

I saw close-up inside women’s cunts – till I had no idea what to think except fear and pain.

I was read extracts from de Sade and Lolita – that became my bedtime story.

The images and words from that time destroys so much.


Porn murdered my ability to imagine and to think visually.

It was my refusal to know the porn.

I cannot think with those images inside me, even with most of my dreams I choose to forget what I may have seen.

I had seen torture, seen what I thought was murder, seen the dead eyes, seen that the girls in the images could and would be me.

I could not let in imagination – it let in emotions of self-harm, of the terror of being inside the words and images of hard-core porn.

If you want to really know the harms of porn – know that murdering of imagination was no minor event.

It was the beginning of not allowing myself to be have privacy – but to believe I could only exist when a man used me sexually.

Losing imagination was a massive part of learning how to kill emotions – makes myself act as if I did not care what pain and terror happened to me – I learnt fast not to care, for what’s the point of caring when it does nothing to end the violence.

How dare anyone make the choice to believe that hard-core porn is harm-free.


Many choose to believe hard-core porn is alright, because the women inside it are not real or just bloody good actresses.

Now that is a conscience ignorance that those women are being harmed.

The insult I have heard and seen so many times – in meetings, in the mainstream media, when relaxing with friends – is that it is ok, coz the women inside hard-core porn are just plastic women.

That is making them sub-humans, just to justify the consumption of porn by you or people you know.

It is so convenient to make women inside hard-core porn sub-humans, coz then it just pretend pain, it is pretend sexual torture, those women like having women-hating words thrown at them.

If you make the choice to see the women as unreal – then you can consume hard-core porn, you can wank over torture without the messy feelings of having a conscience.

And let me say if you make that choice to view the women inside hard-core porn as sub-humans – then I can make the choice to hate you.

For if you see what you call pretend pain – that is real agony, that is a real woman on the receiving of real sexual torture.

If you see fear in the eyes of that woman, and say it is just great acting – you have made your heart so hard and cold, that I would pity you,  if my priority was not wanting to help the woman who you dismiss.

If you can watch double or treble penetration, watch a woman being gang-raped, watch a woman orally raped till she faints or is sick – if you watch that and say to yourself, it is only acting – you are either utter fool or a sadistic bastard.

You are watching a crime of sexual violence made justifiable by re-branding it as entertainment.

How dare anyone say there is no harm in hard-core porn.


This a very small part of what I can say about the harms of hard-core porn.

The main thing is that the women and girls inside hard-core porn are real, and in real-time are having real torturing being done to them.

But even in paintings, pottery and novels that depicts hard-core porn, there is huge harm. For these depictions are giving permission and instructions to violent men on how to utterly destroy the will of women and girls, and how to rape women and girls.

Many paintings, drawings and sculptures are just a record of real violence to real women and girls, especially a record of the hate and violence done to the prostituted class.

In so-called novelists such as de Sade, there is the same recording of real hate and real violence to women and girls.

Hard-core porn uses real violence, real hate and real terror – that is the true harm.

Wake up – and stop making excuses as women and girls are being tortured.

3 responses to “Here’s the Harm

  1. Love this post! It is horrifying but it was great how you turned the post back to the consumer. If the consumer can choose to select the tortured he wanks over as nothing beings, then those of us who have been harmed by porn can choose to see him as the pathetic, selfish being he is. This was hard for you to write and know we love you for your spirit xo


  2. This is a great post Rebecca–‘Hard-core porn uses real violence, real hate and real terror-that is the true harm.Wake up- and stop making excuses as women and girls are being tortured’ —its simple.


  3. Hi Rebecca,

    I wish everyone would read your blog. And not just read it, but really take in what you have to say with the utmost compassion, with everything they know about male violence against women in this world.

    I’m so glad you are standing BY yourself, voicing your right to despise anyone who disregards the torture of women and other beings on this planet.

    Thank you for being so strong, Rebecca.


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