Don’t Call This Trendy

I am very sick and tired of the betrayal of escorting as a fun, high-earning and trendy for bored privileged women to dip into the sordid world of prostitution.

It has nothing to do with the day-to-day reality for most escorts. Most escorts are in as much danger as any other aspect of prostitution, are highly likely to earn a lot less than they were promised.

The bottom line is like all other forms of prostitution, escorts are under the power and control of managers and johns.

How they choose to frame the escort’s existence is a game to them – and is a matter of life and death to many escorts.

The sex trade has always framed escorting as the positive side of the sex trade – given them other names – high-class whores, courtesans, girlfriend experience.

But why do you buy the sex trade’s lies. When you disbelieve arms traders saying they care about peace, disbelieve racist saying it just we all have to find our own levels.

You believe without questioning that escorting is safe, is respectful to the women that do it, that it is easy to leave – that in many ways it is not really prostitution.

Why cannot you think deeper – and question what it is to brought and sold, even when wrapped up with champagne and dinners out, the escort is a prostitute.

She has no rights – only the rights to do and be whatever the john wants, and whatever her manager have framed her as.

She is goods – like all prostitutes, her humanity is stripped away.

All that matters is she fulfils as many john’s porn-dream as possible, and she then may earn enough to blank it out.

If johns choose to treat her with “respect” and are relatively non-violent, that is a relief.

But often there is a sickness even there. Many “gentle” johns are very mentally abusive.

They may want get under her skin by asking many, many, many personal questions – until she is worn out and let something slip.

They may push her to kiss when there is a no kissing rule.

They go to the edge of violence, and then say they were only joking.

But these johns are rare – most johns buy an escort to use as his personal porn-doll for a long period of time.

Rape is common, beatings are common, sexual torture is totally acceptable – christ the sex trade will sort it out if the john murders the escort.

All this violence is the foundation of all aspects of prostitution – why would escorting be any different.

The only difference is that the sex trade can be effective at making sure it hidden from the public gaze.

If violence slips out to the public gaze – the sex trade will lie saying it must have been a crazy john, must have been illegal practices going on, must have been that the escort misunderstood her job or was crazy herself, was something that done without their knowledge.

Their lies are pathetic – but far too many so-called intelligent people choose to believe them.

The truth is that money is made in escorting by supplying the extras – that is mainly sadistic sex. That is what the sex trade is hiding.

It not well hidden, it doesn’t need to be – when so many want to believe escorting is safe, respectful to women and empowering..

Open your eyes – see the agony, fear and despair that is the norm for the majority of escorts.

It not separate from the rest of prostitution – don’t play the sex trade’s game.

7 responses to “Don’t Call This Trendy

  1. Hi,

    I’ve read the whole blog thank to a link on a french blog “lesbienne separatiste” and i realize how much i was unsuspective about many points.
    I was not absolutely for aknowledgment of prostitution as a work and i was not absolutely abolitionnist.
    Now, i know better the real condition of women and girls in prostitution. I even think their situation is getting worse ; now that free sexual relationships are easier, i suppose that less and less men come just to put the little train in the tunnel or “the father in the mother”. (even if this simple act must be painfull). It seems to me, for example, that some decades ago, anal practices or kissing were not allowed in sex trade. Maybe it was a myth maintained even by exited women.

    I also oberve, in France, that the most radical activists for legalization of sex trade are transsexual men to “woman”. Generally, it seems men, included transsexuals,are better than women to endure prostitution. (Though, i’m not absolutely certain). One problem is perhaps that teanssexuals tend to speak in the name of all prostitutes. The point is also that they contribute to perpetuate the whole system.

    Here are some thoughts i wished deliver after the reading of your blog.

    Tanks for your blog.


  2. Open your eyes – see the agony, fear and despair that is the norm for the majority of escorts.

    It not separate from the rest of prostitution – don’t play the sex trade’s game.

    Exactly, all this bullshit about living in a sex-negative society is a fucking crock. Westerners are bombarded with images of fucking from eyes open to eyes shut. I looked at the “personals” section of the paper today and wondered how many womyn “chose” to be there, judging be the overwhelming number of “YOUNG AZN BABE WILL DO ANYTHING” I’d say not many.

    Do pro-prostitutioners really think that we can’t open a paper, a magazine or an internet browsing without seeing right through their pathetic little game?


  3. Gabrielle – thanks for commenting.

    I do not believe that violence and degradation to prostituted women and girls was worse or better in the past. Prostitutes have always used by men to pour in their extreme sexual violence and hatred. Just look at images of prostitution in ancient Greece or the Romans, know that Marquis de Sade viewed the women and girls he abused as the prostituted class, see how the sadism of nineteeth-century prostitution.

    It is more that when women leave prostitution, most want to close out their pasts and what they had to endure. As we have always lived in societies that want and need prostitution to be fun and empowering, even when the prostituted attempt to say their truths it made invisible.

    The history of prostitution is written by the men who use prostitution and those who profit from prostitution. It not written by the prostituted.


  4. @rmott62:

    What about the women who like what they do and don’t care about it being harmful to all? Have you thought about that?


  5. @ Solex
    Even if the women you mention weren’t a tiny percentage of the global sex trade, how is their experience somehow more, or even as, important than the experience of women who are tortured, murdered and treated as less than human?
    I get that women who enjoy and meaningfully choose prostitution exist. I’m just not sure why it’s relevant.


  6. I think it important to think whether women who are prostituted know whether they are happy, for they are often enclosed in an environment that closes out the outside world.

    For me, and many other prostituted women will have the appearance of happiness in order to survive. Part of this involves having to “forget” or close all the negative sides of prostitution, and only knowing the good aspects, however small they are.

    Many women who say they are happy in the middle of the sex trade, and usually very defensive to point of aggression – will speak completely different if they manage to exit.

    Of course, there are a few privileged women who are happy being a prostitute. These women usually do not do it long-term or on a regular basis – many doing hobby prostitution, that is with men they already know and can trust. These men are usually non-violent and treat her with respect.

    That is not the norm for the vast majority of prostituted women and girls. Who as RJ said –

    “who are tortured, murdered and treated as less than human”

    Please fight for the majority – not for a few very privileged women.


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