Tomorrow is my birthday.
My first birthday without Dad. I feel an overwhelming sadness.
I cannot cry, instead I have an intense sickness in my stomach, a slow headache.
And a scream in my heart.
After all the damage done to me by men, my Dad was precious to me because he held me, loved me and give me hope.
I find this birthday hard, because it a family traditional to have my birthday together, and then have separate Christmases.
I ache to be with him so much.
This is a selfish post, but please know the grief is strong.